Could really use some support and advice right now
Salaam everyone, I'm coming to you with a humble heart, hoping you might keep me in your duas and share some guidance on how to handle this heavy situation. I reverted to Islam about a year and a half ago, alhamdulillah, and it’s been a beautiful but really tough path. Growing up, I didn’t really have faith for most of my life, but now I truly believe in Allah and that Islam is the truth. Being a white revert in the West hasn’t been easy-finding community and learning steadily is still a work in progress. Shortly after my first Ramadan, I had a bad accident where an ATV flipped and crushed my right foot. It was shattered, with broken bones and torn ligaments. I couldn’t walk for nearly six months. That was especially hard because I’d just started getting consistent with my salah… and then suddenly I couldn’t pray normally. I struggled to get to the masjid (couldn’t drive), dealt with constant pain, and felt my iman getting shaky. My mental health really suffered. Just when I started walking and praying again, I fell down the stairs and ended up back on crutches after reinjuring my foot. This past Ramadan, alhamdulillah, I was able to pray daily, attend the mosque, and felt my faith growing stronger. I was making real progress in learning and worship, with solid intentions to keep it up. But then, about a week after Eid, I tore ligaments in my knee-I’m pretty sure it happened during sujood in salah-and I’ve been unable to walk since. I was finally starting to see some improvement. Then yesterday, on my first trip back to the gym since the knee injury, I dropped a 45-pound weight on my left foot and broke it. I feel so low and discouraged. It’s like every time I genuinely focus on my deen and my prayer, another serious injury hits my feet. Over the last year, I’ve also gone through a medical procedure due to cervical cancer cells and faced other ongoing health and autoimmune issues. I know this might be a test from Allah… but I feel so stuck. Why does this keep happening, especially when I’m trying to draw closer through salah? It honestly makes me wonder about the evil eye sometimes, like someone’s negativity is willing these repeated setbacks. It’s weakening my iman because it’s exhausting to feel tested over and over, even after you’ve pushed through so much. I don’t feel like I’m at a stage where I can handle this level of trial… and I don’t know how to move past these feelings. I made dua all through Ramadan for health, recovery, and an end to these foot injuries… Jazakum Allahu khayran for reading. I’d be so grateful for any sincere advice, Quranic ayahs, hadiths, or personal insights that might help me navigate this test.