Trying to Balance Family Duties: Seeking Islamic Guidance

Assalamualaikum, I'm a recent revert to Islam and my marriage is hitting a rough patch. I have a son from a past nikah who lives six hours away, so I travel to see him once or twice a month. Every time I leave, things get really tough at home. My wife struggles-she has trouble with my stepchildren, the house gets messy, she has severe panic attacks, and so on. She gets angry when I'm gone too long, calling me selfish and shallow, which makes me feel guilty. I know she's having a hard time and needs her husband there as a qawwam (provider and protector), but she was aware of my son's situation from when we first met. Can anyone share what Islam teaches about how spouses should treat each other and support one another through challenges like this?