Why chastity matters so much to some of us, assalamu alaikum

Assalamu alaikum. I wanted to share why people who have stayed chaste feel so strongly about a spouse’s past sexual sins, and I’m not trying to judge anyone - this is just how it feels to me. For me the pain comes from knowing my husband was intimate with someone else outside marriage. He chose to cross that line with her, but he couldn’t wait for marriage with me? The thought of him being with another woman makes me feel sick and heartbroken. I worry about memories or emotional ties he might still have with an ex, or whether he compares me to someone he was with before. If we become intimate, it’s hard not to picture his past. I don’t think anyone forgets their first time, so how will I feel special if I know there was someone else before me? Will I be able to love him fully with those thoughts in my head? To me monogamy means my husband has only ever been intimate with me, not with people he dated or lusted after in the past. And there’s the fear that even in the akhira we may have differences, but that’s another worry. I’m 28 and haven’t been with any man. I don’t expect my husband to be exactly like me, but I do ask that he not have crossed the line of zina. There’s also an experience gap I’m uneasy about - I’d rather he learn with me than come into marriage already experienced. I just wanted to pour my heart out and explain where I’m coming from. Please feel free to add your thoughts or correct me if I’m mistaken about anything. JazakAllahu khayr.