What does it mean when a man is slow to call?
As-salamu alaykum. My brother has been speaking to a man on my behalf but the communication has been pretty slow. For context: they’re in different time zones, and he keeps apologising because he’s been travelling and visiting sick family. He’s given my mahram his personal number to use (instead of the app they first used), which feels like a positive step. He seems to do the right things but then doesn’t always follow through - I don’t get it, is he just really bad at scheduling? I want to give him the benefit of the doubt since he seems young and maybe not fully ready for marriage yet, and he hasn’t closed the door. But he doesn’t show much initiative. Even after apologising and explaining why he’s been slow, it doesn’t scream high interest to me - though I understand I’m still a stranger to him, so I’m surprised he’s at least offering real reasons instead of being blasé. I pray we move into the proper talking stage soon and that he gets to know me more, how I look, etc., all in a halal way, of course. I’m wondering if he’s uneasy about speaking to my mahram and would prefer to speak with me directly. Since we’re strangers he might think that talking to the girl’s family signals seriousness and maybe he’s not ready for that. Would it be okay for my mahram to say something like, “I’m fine with you both talking directly; I’m not stepping out of the picture,” or would that come across as too forward or like bypassing adab? I’m trying to understand from a man’s perspective why there’s a delay, even though he told us recently that he’s still interested. He’s also cleaned up his online profile to look more professional, which feels like a nice sign that he’s taking this seriously (hopefully not just coincidence!). He seems like a respectable, traditional, religious man, and it doesn’t feel like he’s being inappropriate. I pray to Allah He writes what’s best for me. Ameen.