Short Tip: Be Clear When You Invite Someone - Make It Easy for Them
As-salamu alaykum - quick thought about invitations. Can you imagine getting a message that says, “Hey - we’re probably going to be at the park by the fountain this weekend at some point to get married” and that’s it? It’s absurd. That kind of vague announcement just leaves people guessing and effectively asks them to chase you for the rest of the information. Phrases like “Hey, we should do coffee” or “we should get together sometime” often act the same way - they sound friendly but don’t actually give anyone a role or a plan. This ambiguity can make people unsure where they fit, or push them into people-pleasing mode where they feel they must follow up to get clarity. If you want to spend time with someone, make the plan first and then invite them with the specifics: date, time, place (or whether it’s a call), and any other relevant details. For example: “Salaam - would you like to meet for tea after Jummah this Saturday at 3pm at the community centre?” That way the person can say yes or no without guessing. If you’re always the one who has to plan and reach out, consider whether the relationship is one-sided - that’s worth reflecting on. And a note about reactions: pointing out vague or lazy social habits can make some people defensive. If this makes you uncomfortable, that’s okay - you can take it in or just move on. But do try to be clearer when you invite someone; it’s kinder and more respectful of their time.