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Seeking Guidance on a Personal Struggle

As-salamu alaykum everyone, I'm reaching out here feeling lost and unsure of where to turn, as this is a sensitive matter and I need sincere advice. I'm a Muslim woman raised in a strict, loving family whom I deeply respect-I don't interact with non-mahram men, I've never dated, I dress modestly, pray five times daily, and attend Islamic lectures. However, I've been grappling with a personal challenge for about two years after hearing friends discuss their relationships in ways that aren't aligned with our faith. I know it's wrong, and I constantly make dua, begging Allah to help me overcome this habit, but it feels incredibly difficult and I worry I won't be able to stop. I'm also terrified it might impact my future marriage, fearing that if my potential husband finds out, he might not want to marry me. I understand we're all human and make mistakes, and I'm committed to changing, but I need practical advice and support because I'm really hard on myself about this every day. Jazakum Allahu khayran for any understanding and help.

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Sister, please don't be so hard on yourself. Your honesty and desire to improve are truly beautiful. Keep making dua and trust in Allah's mercy. You're not alone in this struggle.

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Your taqwa is so clear from your post. That fear shows you care. Just take it one day at a time.

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May Allah make it easy for you. Consider finding a trusted female mentor or scholar to talk to? Sometimes sharing the burden helps.

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I felt this deeply. The guilt is heavy, but don't let shaytan make you despair. Keep praying and be kind to yourself.

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May Allah reward you for your struggle. Remember, He loves those who repent. Your future husband will value your sincerity, not just your past.

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