Seeking guidance for my soul as a person of the book

Assalamu alaikum, I hope it's okay for me to share this here. I'm feeling really lost and broken right now, and I just need some advice. Lately, my life has taken some tough turns. I was planning to get married, but those plans fell through. My job with a nonprofit was about to end, so I went back to school for nursing, but I'm struggling with my mental health and school isn't going well this time around either. It feels like everything I had is gone, and I've been having some dark thoughts about giving up. I grew up in another faith but drifted away from it a while back. Islam has always interested me, though I've never really explored it and worry I might not fit in. But recently, I've started fearing for my soul. I'm not sure if I believe in punishment after this life, but I pray that if I were to do anything drastic, Allah would forgive me and show me mercy. I'm scared and don't know where to turn. Any kind words or guidance would mean a lot.