Salaam - Are We Holding On to Our Past More Than Our Future?

As-salamu alaykum. We don’t stay stuck because we always don’t know what we want; most of the time we kind of do. We stay stuck because changing direction feels like betraying the person we used to be. We hold onto dead careers, tired marriages or relationships, exhausting friendships and old opinions for years - not because they still suit us, but because once we said “this is who I am,” and now it feels strange to take that back. We’d rather protect the version of ourselves who picked that degree, that city, that spouse, than admit we’ve outgrown them. It seems easier to endure a life that matches past choices than to move toward a better life that quietly says those choices weren’t right for who we are now. So we call it perseverance, loyalty, patience, when often it’s just fear of feeling like we wasted years. Our future self will not thank us for defending an old story; it will only wonder why we cared more about not embarrassing the person we were than about giving the person we could be a real chance. In the end, only we can decide if our past is a prison or a prologue. If we don’t have the courage to rewrite the story, we silently agree that the smaller version of us gets to be the final one.