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Please Make Dua for My Mother Who Is Suffering Silently

Assalamu Alaikum, I’m not even sure how to start this. It breaks my heart to see my mother living like a prisoner in her own house. She’s one of the most pious, kind, and sincere women you could meet. A devoted Muslimah-she doesn’t even speak to unrelated men, and she covers her head out of respect, even when chatting with her husband’s brother on a video call. She has spent her whole life being obedient, respectful, and dedicated to her family. But my father... he’s changed, or maybe he’s always been this way. He grew up in a broken family full of manipulation, and that has affected him deeply. Years ago, his own sister spread terrible lies about my mother having affairs with relatives. My father never asked my mother or tried to find the truth; he just believed those rumors. From that moment, everything in our lives shifted. For 30 years, my mother has endured emotional and mental pain. She wasn’t allowed to watch TV, use a phone, visit her sick parents, or even attend her own mother’s janazah. She couldn’t wear jewelry or take care of herself properly. My father isolated her completely, based on false accusations that destroyed her confidence. This stress has harmed her health. She now struggles with autoimmune problems and psoriasis. Yet, my father says it’s "Allah punishing her for her sins." It hurts me deeply to hear that. Recently, my sister came to live with us for support after a miscarriage, and then she had a baby. For the first time in a long while, my mother had some light in her loneliness. But now, my father’s suspicious thoughts have turned toward my sister and her husband. Even after 30 years of my mother’s faithfulness and dedication, his paranoia hasn’t stopped. We tried to get help for my mother’s worsening mobility. The first physiotherapist didn’t help, so we brought in an experienced male therapist who actually made a difference. But my father accused my mother of having an affair with him and fired him too. Now her health is getting worse again. Every day feels like the same cycle of hurt and false blame. We’ve tried talking, begging, explaining-but nothing changes. My father refuses to get professional help and won’t see a counselor. We feel so helpless. My mother prays constantly, trusting that Allah will ease her hardship one day. We’ve been going through this for three decades. As her children, we’ve lost our peace. We can’t bear to see her crying quietly anymore. We can’t even speak openly about this because if my sister’s husband’s family finds out, it might harm her marriage as well. We feel stuck between love, fear, and powerlessness. We deserve peace too. We want to see our mother smile again. If anyone has gone through something like this-how did you cope with a manipulative, mentally unstable parent who won’t accept help? Please, any advice or hope would mean a lot. Our hearts are tired.

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Comments

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You’re doing your best in such a tough situation. Sometimes you can only control how much love and support you give. Keep praying and keep caring.

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Sending so much love and dua for your mom. Mental illness in family is so complicated, but remember you’re not alone and help is out there.

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I went through something similar with my dad. It’s exhausting, but staying united as siblings helped me cope better. Sending you strength!

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Wow, I can’t imagine living like that for 30 years. Your strength to keep pushing for your mom’s well-being is incredible. Praying for better days ahead.

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Sometimes people refuse help because they don’t recognize their illness. It’s so frustrating. Keep supporting your mom the best you can and hold onto hope.

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This breaks my heart. It’s hard seeing loved ones suffer in silence. I hope you find some relief soon and your mom gets the peace she deserves.

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I’m so sorry you and your family are going through this. Your mom sounds like such an incredible woman. Sending prayers and hugs your way. Stay strong, sis.

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Your mom’s faith is so inspiring. Keep being there for her and don’t lose hope. Things can change slowly, one step at a time.

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