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1 month ago

Is it normal that my close friends don’t seem interested in my career?

As-salamu alaykum sisters, I've known both of these friends for a very long time - one since primary school and the other since high school. We know each other's families, we're close, and I consider them like family. I'm 30 and decided to start my own business in a field that's important to me. I began work on it in 2023 and really committed fully in 2024. Alhamdulillah I just signed my first contract. I'm so happy because I worked very hard and this shows there is a real business model. I'm a Black woman who has worn the hijab in France for nine years, and this country can be difficult for us, so this is a big win for me, Alhamdulillah. I told one friend casually that I’d signed the contract and got zero reaction. No congratulations, no questions - and it really hurt. Because of that I’ve stopped sharing as much with them. I even did a podcast interview once and sent it to two very close friends who I consider family, and they didn’t listen. Often I feel like there’s little support or interest. Maybe it’s because my work is in consulting/analytics/B2B and can sound complicated, or maybe it’s just how things are. A couple days ago I mentioned a new hire to a colleague (I also work on another project), and she was genuinely happy and congratulated me. That warmed my heart. She understands my work and we talk about it a lot, so she naturally follows it more. My parents and sisters are very supportive too, so I’m grateful for that. Another friend asked in detail how much I was earning, like she was trying to calculate my income. At first I didn't notice, but now I find that strange. I'm not someone who lives only for work - Islam comes first, and I have hobbies, family time, and try to keep a balanced life with good food and exercise. But I’m curious about my friends’ careers and I care about what they do, whether they’re a hairdresser, in social work, or in banking. Maybe friends are there for everyday life things but not for career matters? Has anyone else experienced this - friends who are close in other ways but seem uninterested in your professional life? Any advice on how to handle sharing achievements with friends while protecting my feelings? Jazākallāhu khayran for any thoughts.

+197

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5comments
1 month ago

As-salamu alaykum, love this! I get why you're upset. People show support differently, but silence stings. I’d keep sharing with family and that colleague, and scale back with the others. Protect your joy, you worked so hard.

+3
1 month ago

Huge congrats, what an accomplishment! I'm a bit like you - I only tell certain friends about work stuff now. It’s okay to guard your achievements and celebrate with those who actually care. Also maybe ask them directly once, gently? Could clear things up.

+7
1 month ago

Omg that friend asking about money would make me pause. Congrats on the hire and contract though, seriously impressive. I’d stop expecting reaction and invest in people who uplift you. You’ve earned the right to be proud.

+7
1 month ago

Mashallah congrats, sis - that contract is huge! I’d feel hurt too if my close friends acted like nothing. Maybe set small boundaries about what you share and celebrate wins with those who actually cheer you on. You deserve the hype, don’t let silence dim it.

+9
1 month ago

So happy for you, sister, Alhamdulillah for blessings! I’ve had similar - close friends who don’t get career stuff. Find your cheerleaders and don’t take it personally. A tiny ‘hey, would love your support’ can sometimes open eyes, but protect your peace first.

+6
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