I hardly feel joy these days - advice welcome, assalamu alaikum

Assalamu alaikum. If talk of possible depression makes you uncomfortable, please feel free to skip. I already feel guilty thinking this might make someone else feel worse. Like the title says: I’m almost 19F and I’ve been stuck in a really low slump for weeks. For the past 2+ years I’ve been fighting severe religious OCD and intrusive thoughts that I can only describe as having drained most of my joy. My mind was always overthinking. Sure there were a few good moments, but overall those years were the worst for my mental health. About a month or two ago my mood dropped a lot. I’ve had mood swings before, but this is unlike anything I remember. I’m in a bad mood almost all the time. Nothing seems to shake it. Things I used to find comfort in now irritate me. I’m tired of everything. I can’t get much done, no motivation. I feel empty, numb and indifferent. It’s strange - most of the time I’m grey, but then sometimes I suddenly feel really excited about the future and my life. Then, with no warning, it goes back to grey again. My mother knows about the OCD and the compulsions because she’s been supporting me, and she thinks I’ve improved. In some ways I have, but in other ways it’s worse. She doesn’t know how I’ve been feeling lately - that sometimes I’m just completely tired of life (this has been happening on and off for over a year). I haven’t been able to tell her. I also don’t have access to therapy right now and I don’t have close friends I can lean on. I’m probably being overly melancholic, but I needed to get this out. I don’t know if it’s depression, bipolar, burnout from the last couple years, or something physical. Any duas, advice, or practical tips from sisters who’ve been through similar would mean a lot. JazakAllahu khair.