Feeling Lost - JazakAllah for Listening

As-salamu alaykum. I don’t really know why I’m even here sometimes. I spend my weekends drawing and writing, and my grades are just average. Even keeping up with the five daily prayers is a struggle for me, but I still try to pray. Lately I feel completely unmotivated - each day blends into the next and there’s nothing to look forward to. I don’t have any friends in class and I know people gossip about me behind my back. I keep asking myself what the point of my existence is. I try to be kind to everyone, but inside I just want to hide away and give up. I’m terrible at math and feel so stupid because it seems to click for everyone else but me. It all feels pointless. I have thoughts about ending it, but I can’t bring myself to do that. Who would even miss me? Why bother trying? I’m giving up. I can barely eat without feeling sick, if I eat at all. I hate my life and I hate myself - even though by most standards my life is okay, I still feel so unhappy. Why am I like this? Why can’t I have good grades and friends like others? I don’t have answers, just asking: has anyone felt this way and found anything that helped? Any duas, small habits, or advice from brothers and sisters who’ve been through similar struggles would mean a lot. Please keep me in your duas.