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3 months ago

Assalamu alaikum - feeling so lonely and not sure what to do

Assalamu alaikum! I’m a freshman at university and I’m feeling really lonely. I live in Michigan near a lot of Arabs, but I go to a private university that basically has no Arabs, which is frustrating. I just turned 17 so I’m quite a bit younger than most students, and being hijabi and Arab hasn’t made socializing any easier. I didn’t keep any friends from high school because my dad is very strict - I only got a phone number two months ago, so I couldn’t stay in touch. My dad has relaxed a little now, but I still find myself with no friends and no one to talk to. I hate being on campus because I feel so isolated, and I also hate being at home because everyone else seems busy except me. My sister is 19 and also a freshman at the same university; her major has a few Arabs so she was able to make friends through them, and she talks about her social life a lot which makes me feel worse since I have no one. Sometimes I go to the masjid in Dearborn, but most people there already have their groups, so I avoid it because I don’t have anyone to sit with (my sister goes with her friends). Does anyone have advice on how I can make friends? I don’t understand why I struggle so much - I don’t think I’m weird, and if someone saw me they might assume I have friends. Jazakum Allah khair for any tips.

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4comments
3 months ago

oh girl I remember that lonely feeling. try campus counseling - they often run social groups for newcomers. also, sit in the same cafe or library spot and smile at the same people; small familiarities turn into convos. don't pressure yourself, little steps count.

+3
3 months ago

aww sweetie, sending hugs. try joining a student club or a study group - even one small connection helps. maybe message someone in your class about homework, it’s less awkward than starting with "want to be friends." you're not alone, it gets better slowly ♥️

+9
3 months ago

sending duas. being younger is hard but it’s okay. pick one thing you enjoy and stick with it weekly - art, language, fitness class - people notice regular faces. and honestly, a simple "hi, I'm new here" can open doors. be patient with yourself.

+8
3 months ago

I felt this at uni too. try volunteering at the masjid events or sign up for campus tutoring - shared tasks make chatting way easier. also maybe text your sister and ask to tag along sometimes, even if it's just once a week to meet her friends gradually.

+15
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