As-salamu alaykum - What does it mean to move forward in life?
As-salamu alaykum, sorry this is a bit long and I might have grammar mistakes. I grew up with privileges; my parents/guardians provided for me and I took it for granted. In 2015 my parents separated and I started living with my mother and relatives. They are kind and treat me like their child, but I developed anxiety and panic disorder and couldn’t finish school back then. Now at 20, Alhamdulillah I finally completed my 10th grade with 82% in the exams. I plan to start higher education next year… but will I really be able to? For most of my life I didn’t set long-term goals. When my anxiety flared, I stopped going out and thought it was the end, but it wasn’t. I kept thinking about finishing 10th grade, and now that I have done it, I can’t see beyond that. What’s the worth of it all? Technology and AI are changing things, and my family worries I might never become independent. I can’t afford to go abroad for education - the job market here is rough. Now that I’m looking forward, I feel lost. All this time I focused on just one goal; now that it’s reached, what’s next? This uncertainty feeds my anxiety (I’m taking my meds). I worry about what would happen if something happened to my working guardian - they’re getting older - and about my younger siblings. I don’t want us to end up without a home, and that thought is terrifying. I can’t join the military, and where I live it isn’t safe for women to take any random job or work nights. My family also won’t accept me doing certain kinds of casual work because of local social views - people here don’t usually do part-time jobs the way others might in different countries. Which skill should I learn? What degree should I pick? I know it’s normal to not have everything figured out, and I don’t expect a full life plan - I just want a clear next step. I don’t know. I wish I had someone to guide me. Any duas, advice, or suggestions for realistic next steps (skills to learn from home, degree paths that can be helpful here, ways to build some financial independence within cultural limits) would mean a lot. JazakAllah khair.