Am I wrong for resenting my parents? (Asking for advice)

Assalamu alaikum. I'm in my 5th year of alimiyyah studies and doing my GCSEs this year. I spend most of my time studying and barely get to use my phone because my mum takes it away a lot. I remember being 12 and wanting to end my life because of how they treated me - walking to school in tears after being beaten in the mornings. I was just a child; I used to beg my mum and dad to stop but it was ignored. I can't understand how a child's pleas were dismissed, how badly would a child have to behave to deserve so much hitting. My mum used to hit us with a thin stick in places hidden by clothes, and it left long marks on my skin. As I grew older I learned to avoid trouble, be sneaky, keep my head down, and shut my mouth. I try to control my anger. Today my brother made me so angry by hitting me that I couldn't hit him back; all the bottled-up frustration made me scream. My grandmother was at my house then, and after she left my mum beat me again. It had been a while but it hurt so much; she blamed me and even cried in front of my auntie. My mother has never shown kindness or pride in me, never called me beautiful - always saying I'm ugly, masculine, fat, or stupid, despite my strong school results. I hate my parents, but I respect them enough not to say it to their faces. Is feeling this way haram or wrong? This all feels like a punishment; no matter how much I pray, nothing seems to improve and my iman is getting weak. I don't know how to cope. Please give me sincere advice and duas.