soft, quiet, and figuring out how this fits with being new to Islam

assalamu alaikum. i'm a little nervous sharing this, so forgive me if i'm not totally clear. i reverted recently, and my biggest struggle isn't doubts about iman so much as about who i am. i'm naturally quiet, sensitive, and get overwhelmed easily. i prefer calm, routines, and feeling safe. loud crowds drain me, too much input wears me out, and even well-meaning reminders can feel like too much. after my dad passed, these traits got stronger. i'm slower, more hesitant. i want structure, but i'm afraid of pushing myself into burnout or falling back into guilt. i look at other Muslims who seem so confident, disciplined, and outwardly devout, and i wonder quietly if something is wrong with me for not being like that. sometimes i worry i'm practicing islam too softly - that i should be doing more, learning faster, showing up stronger. but my heart feels fragile, and i'm afraid i'll break the small steadiness i have if i force myself to be someone i'm not. i guess i'm asking if anyone else feels like this. introverted, sensitive, not super driven right now, but still believing and trying - just in a quiet way. are there gentle resources, scholars, lectures, or reminders that focus on rahma, gradual growth, and accepting yourself as you are? things that encourage steady, kind steps rather than intense pressure? i'm not asking for rules or more expectations. i just want to grow without losing myself or feeling like my nature is a defect. jazakum Allah khair for reading, and please remember me in your duas.