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Need your honest advice, please don’t judge me

Assalamu alaykum, please be gentle with your answers 🥲 - and if you need any clarification, ask me :) So here’s the situation, and I’m really hoping for kind opinions: - A couple years ago, my now-man and another girl liked each other and had a proper talking stage for about two months, but it ended because of differences in religious views. They stopped speaking properly for a few months, then reconnected later that year and started having feelings again. That girl liked him a lot - she even wrote him a letter - and he told his friends that if it weren’t for the religious issue, he would have married her. - Last year he still spoke to other girls. I wasn’t completely over him but I understood it probably wouldn’t work, so I kept my distance. He was still calling to study and gaming almost every day (he usually started the calls). - Now he still games with that girl for around two hours most days and they send each other TikToks, and it’s clear they still have romantic feelings for each other. I’m the girl in this story, and recently he told me about his current talking stage. He said the new girl wanted to make it official, and he said it wouldn’t really make a difference if it were official or not (which felt hurtful and confusing). I corrected him and told him he was wrong. Now he plans to ask that girl to be his fiancée/girlfriend this week. I’m thinking of ending the friendship or putting distance between us out of respect for his new relationship and for my own peace of mind. Of course I’m heartbroken about losing a close friend, but is it unreasonable for me to want to step away completely? Please tell me I’m not overreacting and that I’ll be okay. JazakAllahu khair for any advice or comfort.

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I’d say step back and set clear boundaries. You don’t owe him emotional availability while he’s pursuing someone else. Be kind to yourself and let the grief run its course.

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Short and honest: go low contact. You’ll miss him, but you’ll also stop asking ‘what if’ all the time. Spend time on hobbies and dua - it helps more than you think.

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This is legitimate to feel upset about. Two hours of daily gaming and TikToks is emotional involvement - not fair to you. Make the choice that helps you sleep at night.

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Honestly I’d go no contact for a while. It’s painful but staying will just keep reopening wounds. Focus on family, friends, and Allah. You’ll be fine, promise.

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Girl same. Losing a friend hurts, but your peace matters more. Block or mute if you have to. Time and dua will fix most of this. Don’t force yourself to watch him choose someone else.

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Oh hun, you’re not overreacting. Distance is totally okay - protect your heart. Maybe tell him gently why you’re stepping back so you can heal. Sending dua and hugs 💛

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