My mother seems emotionally immature and I’m not sure how to handle it - need gentle advice

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh, TLDR: I need advice on how to gently handle and care for an emotionally immature mother. I’m a Muslim girl and I could really use some help. For context, I have moderate–severe depression and I can’t afford therapy right now. My mother shows a lot of signs of emotional immaturity. She went through a horrible divorce - an abusive husband - and suffered from awful in‑laws and relatives who always felt entitled to give unsolicited advice because they’re older. Her own parents used emotionally harsh methods to ‘discipline’ her (I think it’s part of generational trauma in our culture), so I have a lot of empathy for what she’s been through. The divorce happened when I was three. I still visit my dad - he remarried six years later and now has four kids. Both him and my stepmum are physically and emotionally abusive toward their children (they aren’t like that to me because I ‘behave’, which is mainly because my parents raised me differently). I’m trying to gather evidence so I can help get my siblings out of that situation, I don’t want to just stand by. My maternal grandparents live with us and they also act in ways that are emotionally hurtful, though they probably don’t realize it. That’s affected my mum a lot - she overcompensates, doesn’t get her efforts respected, and I feel my grandmother favors my mum’s brother more despite him being less involved in their care. All this has fed into my mum becoming emotionally immature and sometimes emotionally hurtful, without her meaning to. This has affected me too. I don’t blame her for most of it - she could change - but I don’t know how to explain things to her without risking hurting her again. How can I deal with her kindly and tactfully, keeping her feelings in mind? I can’t really distance myself because of Shariah and because I care for her. Any practical advice or small steps I could try, Insha’Allah? May Allah make things easier for everyone. JazakAllah khair.