Is feeling suicidal considered a sin?

Assalamu alaikum. I’m going through the hardest trial of my life these past 2.5 months. Growing up I faced neglect and abuse from my family, and after my father passed when I was 13 things at home only got worse. I kept going, taught myself about Islam around 18–19, and Alhamdulillah I put on the hijab last year and returned to my prayers. Two and a half months ago my older siblings arranged to take me to a North African country against my will. They took my documents and I’ve already been hospitalised from physical and psychological abuse. Once I genuinely feared my brother was going to kill me, and it was a male relative who stepped in and saved me. My brother also has a criminal record and a history of substance abuse. Right now I’m stuck in a room with only a suitcase and the mattress I sleep on. It’s been 70 days. I keep up my obligatory salah, try to wake for qiyam al-layl and tahajjud, and make dua whenever I can - those things bring me comfort. Still, I find myself thinking about dying. I don’t plan to take my own life - I believe this world is a test - but I keep asking Allah to take my life when He is pleased with me. Is asking Allah that a sin? And is it wrong to tell others that I feel suicidal? JazakAllah khair for reading, and I’m sorry if this message was distressing.