How do you cope with abusive parents while holding on to faith?

Assalamu alaykum. TW: suicide I’ve been dealing with my parents’ abuse for a long time. I’m 19 now and all the anger and hurt have changed me into someone I don’t recognize. It’s so hard to try to grow or improve when you’re constantly being knocked down by people who harm you. I really want to distance myself from them completely, but I fear Allah and don’t want to sever ties permanently if I ever get away. Please, sincerely pray for me. The abuse sometimes becomes unbearable. I want to change, but I can’t seem to despite wanting it so badly. I struggle to focus on my priorities and to form friendships. Having these parents has been the worst thing I’ve faced so far. I can’t stand the pain, and what makes it harder is that I don’t retaliate or insult them because my situation is already rough and I’m trying to stay on Allah’s good side, hoping for a mercy or a miracle. I’m 19 and they still take my phone. I’m 19 and I don’t have a proper social life. They’ve shamed me to my breaking point. I honestly have thoughts of ending my life, but I don’t want to risk the Hereafter. I feel trapped after 19 years. If anyone has sincere advice - how to protect my mental health, how to seek practical support while maintaining respect for parents, or duas and steps to cope - please share. Jazakum Allahu khayr.