Assalamu Alaikum - I wore the hijab for Allah but it's causing me real pain
Assalamu Alaikum, I’m a 23F who has PCOS and severe hair loss because of it. I also have seborrheic dermatitis - flaky, scaly, greasy and sometimes itchy, inflamed skin on my scalp (and face/chest). It’s been really hard on my self-esteem. My scalp hurts a lot and my hair has been falling out since I was 17. Now it’s so thin I feel like I’m actively balding. I started wearing the hijab voluntarily around 18/19 when I began university, to please Allah and out of obedience. I still love wearing it and feel blessed for it. But my hair loss kept getting worse after I began covering. I’ve tried different caps and fabrics, breathable scarves, letting my hair loose during breaks - and the only times my hair seemed to recover were when I wasn’t covering for month-long holidays. My dermatologist only diagnosed the seb derm after I started wearing the hijab. No matter how I style it, whether up or down, with or without a cap, my scalp stays inflamed and painful unless I take the hijab off. I don’t want to disobey Allah by removing it, but I’m really struggling because my hair is disappearing. I’m 23, I love dressing up for women-only gatherings, and now I avoid them because I don’t feel feminine and my hair is gone. My mother has this too and has lost most of her hair, which breaks my heart. I’ve tried vitamins and medicated shampoos and follow what my endocrinologist and dermatologist prescribed - I’m taking what I’m supposed to, but nothing helps while I cover. I also wear the hijab almost every day for work, so I can’t just stop. I’m so upset and feel crushed. Does anyone have practical, faith-respecting advice on how to manage this? I don’t want to abandon my hijab, but I also don’t want to keep losing my hair. Are there ways to protect the scalp or adjust covering that would be permissible and less damaging, or medical routes I might push for? JazakAllahu khair for any support or dua.