A hesitant heart seeking certainty
السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته I started exploring Islam about a year ago, almost by accident. I never really knew any Muslims before, and I just wanted to learn about one of the world's major faiths. Growing up, my family was Christian but not super practicing, so I've mostly been agnostic or atheist my whole life. Maybe because I'm older now, something about Islam just clicked with me in a way I didn't expect. Over this past year, I've been reading lots, watching videos, talking to Muslims... I've looked into beliefs, practices, different schools of thought, even arguments against Islam. I've read the whole Quran, and honestly, even after hearing the criticisms, my pull toward the deen hasn't faded. I remember the first time I prayed-I was at a gathering, and they invited me to join, even though I barely knew what to do. Afterward, I felt something shift inside me, like a quiet peace I can't describe. In some ways, my heart already feels Muslim. But here's where I'm stuck: there are a few historical things I can't fully wrap my head around. I do believe the Prophet ﷺ received revelation, but some points make me question. Like, the embryology descriptions in Surah Al-Mu'minun and Surah Al-Hajj sound similar to what Greek scholars like Galen said, and I've heard those ideas were available in Arabia back then. I know the Prophet ﷺ was unlettered, but he traveled for trade and met many people-couldn't he have heard these things? Now, modern science shows those old embryology ideas aren't accurate, so if it's not a scientific fact, it's hard for me to see it as a divine proof. Some say it was never meant to be a science textbook, but then it can't really be called a scientific miracle either. A lot of the so-called scientific proofs in the Quran don't hold up for me. But this doesn't wipe away the spiritual feelings I've had. Still, as someone with no Muslim background, embracing Islam means big life changes. I feel like I need some kind of assurance-just something to anchor my faith. I've made dua, even prayed istikhara, and I keep reading Quran and learning to pray. Maybe I'm just overthinking, but I can't say I'm fully convinced yet. Any advice or insights would mean a lot. جزاكم الله خيراً