Feeling Lost on My Path Back to Allah's Mercy

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. I'm seeking some guidance and support. For the past three years, I've been in a talking stage with a brother who was my classmate in college. I introduced him to my parents quite early on, hoping it would lead to something halal, and my family encouraged him to involve his parents and move towards marriage. His situation has been difficult-he's still studying and isn't financially settled yet, so he hasn't been able to take that step. We both now live in the US for our studies, but we live separately and don't meet often. Lately, his behavior has become hurtful and disrespectful. It's left me feeling broken and disappointed in myself. I pray my five daily Salah, and my trust in Allah is strong, but I feel I've wronged my own soul by allowing this situation to continue. I make dua every day for a blessed, halal marriage. Today, during an argument, he said some very harsh words that cut deep. I'm struggling emotionally, especially being so far from my family and close friends. The stress is overwhelming. The hardest part is the shame I feel in turning to Allah, asking for His help to fix a situation I feel responsible for creating. Any words of encouragement or advice from the community would mean the world right now.