Attending church while secretly Muslim – am I handling it right?

Salaam everyone. My path to Islam was kinda unusual, and I’m not new here (just using a fresh account). InshaAllah one day I’ll share what drew me to Islam and why I accepted it. But for now, the issue is that my family (besides my sibling) is against me leaving Christianity to become Muslim. After one huge argument, I realized I’d have to practice in secret while being made to go to church with them every Sunday. I can’t risk more conflict by straight up refusing to go and declaring I’m Muslim no matter what. So for now, I practice discreetly until I’m able to live openly as a Muslim. That means I still attend church with them each week. When I’m there, I never join in prayer or worship because that would feel like shirk. But communion was really troubling me. (It looks like this: [image link]) At first it was tough to avoid – the wafer was one thing, but the drink felt like a bigger deal. Since they see it as symbolizing the blood of Jesus and connect it with healing and protection, it felt like shirk even though I didn’t intend it. After some weeks I figured out how to get around communion. Before church I put a tissue and pin in my pocket. During the service I use the pin to poke a hole in the cup and let the liquid soak into the tissue in my pocket. Then when communion happens, I hold the cup in a way that hides it’s empty. For the wafer, I use the moisture from my palm to soften it so when I break it, my piece folds up – making it easy to pretend I ate it. Dealing with all that was one thing, but lately some people I know have been saying I’m not a real Muslim and that I’m still Christian because they see me at church. For about a week there were hints that I’m just hopping on a trend. It annoyed me because no amount of explaining would stop the skeptical looks, like I’m lying to save face. These rumors created a bigger worry: lots of people now know I’m Muslim (even if some think it’s fake). I’m scared that someone from church will tell my family I’m not actually participating. It wouldn’t take much digging for them to find out – my online accounts are mostly about Islam, I have notebooks studying the deen and seerah, a DIY tasbih from an old pearl necklace, I don’t wear or keep the cross jewelry they give me, and I have the Qur’an on my phone. Some days I remind myself that some of the Sahabah faced way worse while practicing in secret, so I shouldn’t feel entitled to an easier test. Other days I wonder what would happen if one person exposed everything. I truly don’t want to leave this deen, even if my livelihood was threatened. So should I just ignore what others say and focus on building a life where I can practice openly? Or should I do what some suggest and participate in church to seem ‘reformed’ until I can be independent?