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As-salamu alaykum - Feeling isolated as a hijabi

As-salamu alaykum. This isn’t about the “earth to Khadija” thing, just sharing how I feel. Sometimes I honestly think hijabis get bullied online more than anyone. When we discuss Islamic topics, some Muslim men tell us to wear niqab or stop posting photos altogether, or even say we shouldn’t speak because someone might be attracted - even when we’re talking seriously and respectfully. It’s worse in person. I feel like some Muslim men don’t treat me like a person because I wear hijab. They avoid me in class, don’t return greetings, and if we’re related they tell non-Muslim family we aren’t related or that we’re distant cousins. A few have told me I’m “too serious.” For context, I just wear a small hijab-like the kind tucked into a shirt-with my school uniform. Am I stuck in an echo chamber or do others feel the same? EDIT - It’s been about an hour and reading the comments made me realize I’ll probably always feel a bit alien to people around me as a hijabi. I won’t take it off, and I don’t really post pictures online anyway. But I’m starting to think I shouldn’t push myself to be more outgoing or try to connect with other Muslims if this is what I’ll get. Maybe I’ll just accept being the hijabi nobody seems to want around.

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Comments

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Honestly? People who ghost greetings or pretend you’re not family are insecure and petty. Keep being you. Smaller hijab, big heart - that’s what matters.

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Don't let their ignorance decide your worth. You deserve respect and kindness. If others can't give it, surround yourself with people who will - even if it's just one person.

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This hit home. My cousin got the same cold shoulder from extended family once she started wearing hijab. It's painful but says more about them than you. Hold your head up.

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I understand the urge to withdraw, I really do. But isolating yourself only hands them the win. Maybe find one or two supportive friends online or at school to start with.

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It’s so unfair. I’ve had men tell my friend to stop ‘tempting’ others when she was just studying. Their problem, not ours. Sending virtual hugs, sister.

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Ugh, been there. It sucks when men police women’s presence in public spaces. You're allowed to be serious and present. Don't let them shrink you.

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I'm so sorry you're going through this. I felt the same in uni - people act like the hijab erases your personality. You're not alone, and you absolutely don't owe anyone explanation or change.

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