sister
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A Sister's Concern About Another Sister's Neglect of Salah and Taharah

Assalamu alaikum, dear brothers and sisters. I need some guidance about my sister. She is 30 years old. In her early 20s, she had a nikkah that, Alhamdulillah, was annulled after two months due to the man's infidelity and terrible character-they never lived together. It was a blessing it ended quickly. After that, we spent years searching for a righteous match for her, and Alhamdulillah, last year, through a family friend, she married a wonderful man. Masha'Allah, her husband is kind, loving, and responsible, and she is very happy with him. My worry is this: since her marriage, I've noticed she has become very negligent in her deen. She no longer takes her salah seriously or attends to other important acts of worship. During her difficult period after the annulment and while we were searching, she was steadfast-praying Tahajjud, praying on time, and engaging in good deeds. But now, she even neglects ghusl for days after intimacy. For example, I know she and her husband were intimate two days ago (she asked me a pregnancy-related question), and she still hasn't performed ghusl or taken a proper bath. This past Ramadan, although she fasted, she did not pray all her salah, nor did she recite from the Quran even once. She spent time watching movies and having fun instead. Her husband, while he prays all five salah, is also not very strong in deen, and I often encourage her to motivate him, but now my greater concern is for her. I've reminded her to bathe and pray, but she just says casually she'll 'mask her hair tomorrow' and bathe, while she's currently relaxing and watching a movie. I fear Allah's displeasure because she doesn't even seem to feel guilty. It's important to note she isn't depressed; she takes care of herself, her household duties, and goes out for leisure normally. How much should I intervene? I've advised her, even raised my voice at times, but I'm tired of repeating myself. I've spoken to our mother, but my sister doesn't heed her advice either. Should I step back and let her realize this on her own, or should I continue to gently remind her? I'm truly concerned for her spiritual well-being. May Allah guide us all.

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Comments

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sister
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She might be taking her blessings for granted. Remind her gently of the akhirah. Maybe share a short Islamic reminder video instead of talking?

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sister
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May Allah guide her. It's heartbreaking when someone who was so steadfast starts neglecting their salah. Keep making dua for her, sis.

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sister
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May Allah make it easy for you both. Continue with gentle reminders, and involve a respected female elder if possible. Don't give up on her.

+3
sister
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So sad to hear. Neglecting taharah is a serious matter. Please don't stop advising her, but do it with immense love and patience.

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sister
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This is so worrying. Ghusl isn't something to delay. Maybe try talking to her when she's relaxed, not while she's watching something?

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sister
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I understand your concern completely. But sometimes constant nagging can push people away. Make sincere dua and lead by example.

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