Auto-translated

Struggling with wanting to follow my faith fully when my family is worried about safety

Assalam Alaikum everyone. I'm a young Muslim woman about to start in-person college soon. I live in Texas, which you know can be a pretty conservative area. For a long time, I've really felt called to wear niqab and dress as modestly as possible, but my parents are honestly scared about my safety here. My dad says if I'm going to cover, I should learn self-defense first, which I get-and actually, I already have some skills, I'm not super tiny or fragile. My mom thinks I should take it step by step, maybe start with hijab and then move toward more coverage if I want. But both of them are still really not on board with the idea. This is gonna be my first time back in a classroom in like ten years, and honestly, what I'll wear is a huge stress for me. I had this picture in my head-niqab, modest outfits, just focusing on class. Now with my parents being so against it, I'm just confused and stuck. I already dress pretty modestly, basically no skin showing except hands and face/hair, and my clothes aren't tight at all. I was hoping to start wearing khimar and niqab early this year so by the time fall came, I'd feel confident and comfy dressing that way. But now I can't, and I don't know what to do instead. I can keep dressing how I do now, but showing my face and hair doesn't sit right in my heart. I really don't know what the right move is. I don't want to disobey my parents, but I also don't want to let down Allah. I have this strong love for my deen and doing things properly, but it feels like everything is making it hard or holding me back. If anyone's been through something similar or has advice, I'd be really grateful to hear it.

+89

Comments

Share your perspective with the community.

Auto-translated

Start with hijab at college for now. Once your parents see you're safe and confident, they might soften. Baby steps sometimes work.

+7
Auto-translated

I'm in the UK and had the same issue at uni. My parents also wanted me to start slow. I'm glad I did-it helped everyone adjust, including me.

+3
Auto-translated

I feel you, sis. The struggle is real when your heart wants one thing and your family another. Keep making dua, and may Allah open a way.

+3
Auto-translated

Your dad's suggestion about self-defense is honestly smart, especially for Texas. Maybe show him you're serious about that too? Could ease their fears.

+2
Auto-translated

May Allah make it easy for you sis. Your intentions are so pure, He sees that.

+2
Auto-translated

You're between obeying parents and obeying Allah, that's so tough. Pray istikhara and trust that Allah will guide you through this.

+1

Add a new comment

Log in to leave a comment