Marriage in doubt after finding out his past, feeling completely broken

Salaam everyone, Hope you're all okay. I need some advice, and I'd be really grateful if you can help based on what I'm about to share. I'm being totally honest so I can get the best guidance, and Allah is my witness that I'm trying to be fair. Because of my situation, I had to search for a husband on my own. I met a wonderful man-practicing, strong-minded, family-oriented. After knowing him for a year and waiting for him to start the marriage process, I discovered that the whole time we were together, he'd been talking to women on literally every app you can imagine. What's worse is he had thousands of indecent videos and pictures of women. I only have my mum, so I told her about him and all our plans. The trouble is we're in different countries right now, and when we marry I'd move to his home country. He apologised and deleted all the apps, and as for the pictures-well, I smashed his phone to bits the moment I got hold of it and saw what I saw. It's been six months since I found out, and even though he says he's repented many times, I still can't get over what I witnessed and what he was into. He wants me to cover properly, not do things like Botox, and avoid certain styles-which I'm fine with because I've always tried to do the right thing-but it's the hypocrisy that hurts. He'd comment on my looks, saying my makeup is too much, I shouldn't use filters on photos, or get things like nails and lashes done (which I don't anyway), yet all the women he was messaging were doing exactly that, and he admitted he liked their appearance. I've reached a point where I don't trust him, I always feel he's cheating. My self-worth is destroyed, and I've spent a year and a half of my life waiting to marry him, and now he's telling me I should just move on. He says the pictures, videos, and chats meant nothing, that they were meaningless. I tried to forgive him and work through it so our marriage could happen, but he's becoming more and more distant, and what's worse is he doesn't grasp the damage he's caused. He acts like it's nothing, so I should get over it. When I ask him if he'd accept this for his sisters, he gets really upset. I genuinely don't know what to do or how to heal from what I've seen-the pictures, the videos, the conversations, the most indecent things. Am I really supposed to just forget? We're meant to have our nikkah soon, and he's blaming me for being distant, saying it's because I nag, fight, and bring up the past. He once told me himself, "I'm sorry, I haven't given you your rights, you deserve better, and I'll do more." But instead of making me feel loved and wanted, he's grown cold. It's like I don't exist. I'm always the one calling him, begging for attention, reminding him of his responsibility toward us. I don't even feel like he wants me; he's not interested. We hardly talk, and when we do it's just silence or simple chat about how we're doing, nothing about each other. I feel like he's only marrying me for the sake of it, but his heart isn't in it. I really don't know what to do. I was so happy, and my mum was so happy-she doesn't have long left as she's very unwell. If I don't go ahead, what do I tell her? I feel ashamed to share the real reason for our problems. I literally have no one to turn to-no other family or friends. I'm haunted by what he did even now. I could never have imagined him doing such things; he's very religious, has sisters who've been through bad relationships themselves, and he knows right from wrong, yet… Please, can someone advise me? I honestly feel like giving up on life. I was faithful, loyal, and ready for marriage. The life I wanted was one where we'd make our marriage work for Allah's sake and stay away from haram. I wanted a family, as I've never really had one. I feel like he's ruined my life-first with the year of cheating, and now by being with me but not even talking to me or showing any interest. Sorry for any mistakes in this message, I'm crying so hard I can barely see.