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1 month ago

Feeling Lost and Unsure About My Path - Need Advice

Assalamu alaikum. I'm a 25-year-old male who finished university last year and I'm feeling really lost. I used to do very well in high school, alhamdulillah, and I was in the IB diploma programme. I got into the biomed program at the local university with the plan of finishing that degree and applying to medical school to become a doctor. Everyone told me I had the potential. But once I started uni I became demotivated and depressed. I didn't enjoy the courses, I had no friends, and I couldn't bring myself to put in the work. In my second year I switched to engineering because I liked math in high school and thought it might suit me better. That didn't go well either - I still couldn't find the discipline to study and I hated a lot of the subjects. The degree here normally takes 4 years, but it took me 5 years to finish mechanical engineering because my grades were poor and I had to retake courses. On top of that, I had the two years of biomed, so it ended up taking me 7 years to graduate. I know I shouldn't compare myself to others, but it's hard not to. Many of my high school peers already have master's degrees, are in med school, or are working full-time, and I'm only just getting my bachelor's. Worse, I don't even like engineering. I did a summer internship and every minute felt terrible. I can't imagine spending my life in that kind of job. I tried exploring teaching and enrolled in an online TESOL course, but I didn't enjoy that either and dropped it. I know it sounds spoiled or picky. I realize not everyone gets to work in a dream job. Still, I want something I can be passionate about - something that would make it easier to get up at 6am and face the day. People younger than me seem to have found their path already, and I'm 25 with no clue. I spent 7 years and paid tuition only to end up with a degree I probably won't use. Am I stuck working retail for the rest of my life? My parents are getting older and I'm their only son. I should be able to support them and look after my younger sister, but I can barely support myself. I want to get married, but who would want their daughter to marry someone who feels like a failure? Where will I find the money to provide for a wife and children? I hope you can understand. I have no passion, no clear goals, and I don't see a way to earn well and support my family. Maybe this sounds weak, but sometimes I wish I could just end it all and be done. I'm not asking for a miracle - I just needed to put this out there because I've bottled it up for so long and I want someone to listen. I'm exhausted.

+161

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4comments
1 month ago

Brother, you're not alone. Took me ages to figure stuff out too - jobs come and go, but you're not a failure for changing paths. Start small: freelancing or short courses that pay quickly. And please talk to someone about those thoughts, serious help can make a big difference.

+4
1 month ago

Hey man, been there. Those suicidal thoughts are serious - reach out to a helpline or someone close now. In practical terms, pick any job that pays while you explore interests: tutoring, delivery, small tech bootcamps. Stability first, passion can come later.

+7
1 month ago

Wa alaikum salam. Don't beat yourself up - many of us take detours. Look for counseling at uni or a career coach, even low-cost options. Mental health matters more than a perfect CV. Also, family will support you if you're honest and trying.

+11
1 month ago

Man, I get this so much. I wasted years switching majors and felt crushed. Don't rush decisions now - try part-time work to build confidence and save, then test hobbies as side gigs. Marriage can wait until you're stable. You're not worthless, just human.

+4
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