As-salamu alaykum - I feel like a hypocrite when trying to do good
As-salamu alaykum. I’ve done really bad things in the past, things I’m ashamed of and that I don’t think anyone around me would ever do. I’ve been carrying this guilt for a long time, and it shows in how I talk about myself. I want to start doing better again - like gently reminding people if something is wrong or haram, or reading Quran more openly - but I keep feeling like a hypocrite when I try, since I see myself as the worst of sinners. Sometimes it feels like if I wasn’t perfect already, my attempts at goodness don’t count. But I know Islam teaches that repentance and returning to good deeds are important, even after big mistakes. I’m just struggling with the shame and the fear that others will judge me or that my actions are meaningless because of my past. Has anyone else felt this way? Any advice on moving past the guilt and doing sincere good without being paralyzed by shame? Jazakum Allah khair.