Turning to unhealthy coping - seeking Allah's help
Assalamu alaykum, I'm a female senior about to start college, and lately the stress from school and my very strict parents has become overwhelming. When they discipline me they sometimes hit me, even now that I'm older, and growing up in that environment has left me tense and anxious for years. School pressure made it worse: I developed migraines with aura and later had stress-related seizures. Watching friends and classmates smoke or vape makes it look like an easy way to numb the constant racing thoughts, and sometimes it feels so tempting. I've been praying for things to change - that my parents stop being so harsh, that school gets easier, or that I become strong enough to handle this - but I feel like my dua aren't answered. I know we're meant to be patient and steadfast, but I'm sinking into depression and sometimes have dark thoughts. I don't want to act on them because I don't want to displease Allah or commit sins, and I worry about my health too, especially since my brain is still developing. Still, it feels like my prayers aren't reaching anywhere and that Allah is just watching me struggle. My salah routine has slipped; I forget or stop praying for weeks at a time. I feel very alone and am not sure how to keep going. I know I should hold on to hope in Allah, but I need practical ways to cope that won't harm my faith or my body. Does anyone have advice on how to manage overwhelming stress and depression in an Islamic way? How can I protect my health and iman, repair my prayer habits, and seek help when my home situation feels abusive? Any dua, Quranic reminders, or steps to find support would mean a lot. JazakAllahu khair.