Struggling with envy, longing, and low self-worth – looking for advice and duas

Assalamu alaikum, I’m going through a really tough patch in life and I’m literally reaching out everywhere I can think of for support. I started therapy not long ago, but honestly, it hasn’t kicked in yet-maybe it just needs more time. I know I’m not the only one facing these struggles and tests. If anyone can share some advice and keep me in their duas, I’d truly appreciate it. I could use all the help right now. Hitting your early 30s and not being married, man, it brings some heavy feelings I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I deal with ghibtah and maybe something like intense infatuation? Every time I see a couple or a beautiful Muslim sister, I sink into despair over what I’m missing and what my future holds. I’m trying hard to have tawakkul, but I keep falling short. I always make dua for any couple or person who stirs up these feelings, hoping to ward off the evil eye. There are some lovely, married folks around me, and one Muslimah stands out-she got married early, in her early 20s. I rarely see her (honestly, I hope our paths never cross again; we barely know each other anyway). She’s so stunning to me that I find it hard to even glance her way and I end up looking away. Anyway, I haven’t met her husband, but I can’t stop wondering what I’m lacking. Back when I was younger, I never approached anyone-it just wasn’t done back then and I had no money. Now I’m so programmed to keep my distance and lower my gaze, and I’ve got zero confidence. I keep asking myself how people even manage to approach and win the heart of someone like that. It feels impossible for me. My self-esteem is shot and I’m not totally sure why. I think not being able to get married has made it worse. I don’t meet many people, and even then, I can’t just marry someone to tick boxes. I pray and make dua for these feelings to go away and for a content heart. Some things I’m actually doing to shift my mindset are exercising, staying busy with hobbies, going to therapy, and I’ve also started fasting. I’m surviving day by day, but I spend sleepless, tear-filled nights just talking to Allah. This has been going on for over a month now-I felt low before but it’s been getting steadily worse. I’m not suicidal, and I’m not at risk of zina, but my iman is very weak. I’m surviving, but I really want to live and feel some joy. I don’t know what I expect from this post-maybe just a space to let it out.