Sisters who reverted and lost a non‑Muslim parent - how did you cope?

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته sisters, I hope you’re all doing well, inshaAllah. I wanted to hear from sisters who are reverts/converts and who’ve faced the loss of a parent who wasn’t Muslim. For context, I reverted about 16 years ago and I’m in my early 30s. How did you cope with the death/loss of a non‑Muslim parent? I lost my father almost a year ago and it was incredibly painful, but alhamdulillah my iman stayed intact. What I found hard was not being able to make duaa for him in the way my heart wanted to. To be clear, by “struggle” I don’t mean I struggled with accepting Allah’s decree - alhamdulillah I accept it, and I know our Prophet ﷺ experienced hardship too. I also understand we can’t change the ruling about what’s permissible after someone dies who didn’t accept Islam, and I’m not asking for a debate about that. I believe Allah is the Most Merciful and the Most Just. What I’m really asking is about the emotional side: how did you personally get through that feeling of wanting to supplicate for a parent yet knowing the limits of what we can do? Did you feel lonely in that grief? How did family and friends respond - did other Muslims with Muslim parents understand, or did it feel hard for them to relate? Any practical or spiritual ways you found helpful would mean a lot. Jazakunna Allahu khayran 💕