Sisters, please keep me in your du‘as
Assalamu’alaikum sisters, I’m the same 25-year-old Muslimah in Italy who wrote before about the hard time I’m having at home. Jazakum Allah khayran for all your du‘as and support - they mean so much. My household is controlling, neglectful, and not a safe place for me. I have no real privacy, very limited resources, and constant pressure that’s hurting my health, my mind, and my ability to practise my deen. Even small things like studying, planning, or asking for help can set off panic, dissociation, and shutdowns because independence and following rules bring up years of trauma. I once had to run away in a very dangerous situation, and I can’t go through that again, though I’m also terrified of being forced into it - may Allah protect us. I’ve tried to manage everything by myself, but Allah has shown me the limits of my body and mind. Pushing past those limits risks severe harm; dissociation and escape become survival responses under extreme pressure. Pretending that’s not happening would be dangerous. Options like shelters, social housing, or jobs aren’t really solutions for me. They don’t offer the emotional safety, protection, or real autonomy I need, and even well-meaning rules or structure can trigger trauma. My mind and body don’t work safely in those conditions, and my imaan is at risk if I stay unprotected. I can’t live or act safely on my own right now. I need care, protection, and trustworthy guidance. In Islam it is a right to have a wali and a husband can - if he’s caring and pious - provide stability, emotional support, and protection that I cannot get through independence alone. Because I’m isolated here with no real network in Italy, finding a safe, suitable, and faith-centered marriage feels nearly impossible. A kind, protective husband who puts deen first could let me live with dignity, security, and peace instead of just surviving. I’m sharing this sincerely, not as a dramatic plea. I’m asking for guidance, practical advice, and heartfelt du‘as from sisters who understand these struggles. Anything that might prevent my mind or faith from breaking down completely would help. I didn’t write this lightly - please trust I’ve tried my best and I reached these conclusions slowly. May Allah protect us, guide us to what’s best, and make a way for those of us in hardship. Ameen.