Seeking guidance: du‘a, patience, and unreturned love

As-salamu alaykum dear brothers and sisters, I’ve been carrying something heavy in my heart for a long time now. It’s been more than a year, and I don’t even know how to properly name what I feel anymore. What began as a simple interest grew into something deeper, something that lives inside me whether I want it to or not. I have feelings for a man I’ve never truly known, never truly met, and yet my heart is attached to him. The way our paths crossed was unusual, and maybe that’s why part of me keeps thinking there was meaning in it, that it was somehow written. We never had much contact, but my heart never adjusted to his absence, and it never felt peaceful in his presence either, because I always worried it wouldn’t last. Still, I tried everything I could. I prayed tahajjud until I felt drained, made du‘a in every sajdah, during the rain, after the athan, whenever I could. I kept doing istikhara and even had dreams afterward, but nothing became clear. What bites the most now is the shame. The shame of having opened my heart, of showing feelings that maybe were never meant to be shared. I feel embarrassed in a way I can’t fully explain. Sometimes I’m even ashamed to make du‘a, wondering if I’m asking for something I’m not meant to have. And yet I still whisper his name in my prayers. I still hope. I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this, so I carry it mostly in silence and speak only to Allah. There is a constant longing I don’t fully understand. Whenever something happens in my life, good or bad, I notice the urge to share it with him, to hear his thoughts. I feel like I’ve said a lot, yet never the right things, because words fail to capture what’s inside. I’m not even angry about how things went between us. I’m sad for myself. I feel sorry for my own heart, because despite painful moments it never grew cold toward him. It scares me how willing I am to put up with everything, how I love everything connected to him. My heart seems to live its own life while my mind tries to move on. I know only Allah can turn hearts. I have asked Him to turn my heart away, but it keeps returning. One step forward, two steps back. Alhamdulillah, many of my du‘as have been answered in other parts of my life, but in this matter there is only silence - a deep, lonely silence. So I don’t know what to do anymore. Should I keep hoping, or should I be patient and let these feelings fade? Has anyone else experienced an unreturned love, a longing that stayed despite lots of du‘a? Did your prayers bring change? Any sincere advice or du‘a would mean so much. Jazakum Allahu khayran for listening, and sorry for the many words.