Question about a particular Hadith - need clarity, please

Assalamu Alaikum, I came across a Hadith that says: “If a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning.” I’ve heard many different explanations and I’m struggling to understand it, so I’d really appreciate some help. My main concern: I keep hearing people say there’s no valid reason for a wife to deny her husband intimacy. That doesn’t sit right with me because there are many legitimate reasons to refuse-being ill, pain or discomfort, extreme fatigue, the menstrual cycle, or other valid physical or emotional reasons. Another thing I hear is that you can’t refuse out of pettiness. But isn’t pettiness often rooted in anger or emotional hurt? Spouses regularly act petty when they’re upset with each other, so I’m confused where the line is. Some say being angry or upset isn’t a valid reason either, yet Islamic teachings acknowledge that emotional closeness and feelings matter in intimacy for many women. For example, the Prophet ﷺ advised gentle approaches like kisses and kind words, and the Qur’an and Sunnah emphasize treating spouses as garments for one another and living with them in kindness. There are also narrations encouraging mutual consideration so both spouses’ needs are met and neither is rushed. So I’m puzzled: why would a woman be cursed for refusing intimacy when having it wouldn’t address her emotional state? Why should she be expected to be intimate while angry or upset? No one is likely to be emotionally or sexually fulfilled when they are in that condition. Intimacy ought to be between two consenting, willing adults-not something done out of fear of a curse. If any of my sources or understanding are incorrect, please correct me. JazakAllahu khair for any insight.