Need Advice: Balancing Respect and Boundaries with a Very Religious Aunt
Assalamu Alaikum brothers and sisters, I went out recently with my mum, my cousin and my aunt to a place about an hour from home. My aunt is very religious and is part of a particular Muslim group (I can’t remember the name). I admire her commitment - she even teaches Quran online for free to young girls - Mashallah. But her behaviour made the day a bit stressful for me and I’m not sure how to handle it. She kept turning every single topic into a lesson about Islam. For example, I asked when she’d be free so I could cut her hair soon, and she began talking about how busy she is with her teaching and classes. That then turned into her giving me tajweed tips even though I already learned from my own teacher. She also complained that she had to “cancel” classes because we went out - even though she attended some lessons during the trip and gave a teaching session in the middle of our day. When we were at the mosque she decided to give a talk to the women after prayer, so I sat in the car for an hour because I was on my period. For the whole day every conversation my mum or I tried to have got steered into Islamic teachings. I’m grateful she wants to help others, really, but the trip was supposed to be a chance to relax and spend time together, and it felt like being lectured all day instead. I don’t want to disrespect her or discourage her from teaching - that would feel wrong - but it is getting hard to enjoy outings with her. It’s happened before: on another day out she volunteered and spent an hour and a half teaching, and we mostly sat in silence during the journey. I don’t want to hurt her feelings. Should I let her do her thing and be patient, or gently speak to her about giving us a bit of space on family days? Has anyone been in this position? Any advice on how to bring it up respectfully would be really appreciated.