I’m Hesitant to Go to Mecca and Madinah This Ramadan

Assalamu alaikum, I know this may sound strange, but I’m in a tough spot. My mom insists I go with her and my siblings to Mecca and Madinah for Ramadan and then stay two extra months to study Qur’an - three months total. Alhamdulillah I’ve been to the Haram a few times, but travelling with my mom usually turns into a nightmare, astaghfirullah. We argue a lot there. She expects me to cover my face, which I’m not used to and don’t feel comfortable with, and she wants me to pause my studies for those three months - that would put my graduation at risk. Every time I go with her she also sets me up with random potential spouses even though I told her not to, especially during Ramadan. It always happens out of nowhere and I feel so overwhelmed and want to cry because I’ve said I don’t want that. Then for the rest of the trip she says hurtful and demeaning things when I refuse. I feel guilty admitting this because these are the happiest places for Muslims, but I often end up crying and regretting going because of the way my mom behaves. I’m not proud of feeling this - what should I do? She’s insisting I’m going this Ramadan and people around me can’t believe I’d rather stay home. Is it wrong to feel this way? I know many don’t get the chance to visit and I don’t want to sound ungrateful. I also don’t want to repeat those painful memories - I would likely be crying almost every day, stuck in a small apartment, expected to babysit around the clock and run after my siblings. Even relatives and strangers have had to step in to calm her down for small things. I’m torn between duty and my own wellbeing - any advice or duas would help.