I love my mother but find it hard to cope with her

Assalamu alaikum, I’m a 20-year-old son, the oldest of five (three sisters and a brother). My relationship with my mother is complicated and I’d like some Islamic advice and perspective. My mother has a quick temper and when she’s stressed she sometimes lashes out, even making hurtful du‘aas and saying harsh things to me and my siblings. That emotional weight is tough on all of us. At the same time, when she’s calm she’s very caring and sweet. I think a lot of her behavior comes from worry, but it often comes out in ways that hurt us. My father is usually busy with work and is away a lot. Even when he’s home he doesn’t step in much, so my mother ends up being the strict and feared person in the house. Because of this I feel I grew up faster. I ask for little, try to help around the house, and mostly rely on myself. My younger siblings - especially my sisters - aren’t as independent. My mother insists on doing everything herself and won’t let them help, especially in the kitchen. I tell her jokingly that if she doesn’t teach them basic household skills they’ll struggle later, but she says her daughters shouldn’t be burdened and should focus on education. I agree education is crucial, but I still think learning simple life skills and sharing chores would ease her load. I taught myself basic cooking and household tasks from online videos so I could try to help, but often my offers are refused. Over time my mother’s relationship with my sisters has become more strained. They argue a lot, with shouting and harsh words. She’s softened toward me more than toward them, which puts me in a hard emotional spot. What worries me most is that I’ll be leaving soon to study abroad. I feel guilty about leaving her with so many responsibilities, especially with my father frequently away. I feel like I’m her main support at home and I’m anxious about what will happen when I’m gone. I’m trying to be a dutiful son and honor my parents, but I’m overwhelmed and confused. I’d be grateful for Islamic guidance: how should I deal with a parent who loves but sometimes harms emotionally, how to set healthy boundaries with kindness, and how to prepare to leave home without feeling like I’m abandoning my responsibilities? Jazakum Allahu khairan.