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How to stop daydreaming about marriage and love, assalamu alaikum

Assalamu alaikum - I feel like no matter how many hobbies I pick up, how much time I spend with friends, doing ibadah, studying, working, exercising, or improving my mental health and career, I still go to sleep imagining what it would be like to love and be loved by just one person. Maybe it’s the free time from uni break (hence why I’m scrolling more than usual), but my mind keeps drifting to romance. Not crushes on celebrities like when I was younger-now it’s about finding and marrying the one written for me. I don’t want anyone else. I imagine meeting the right man in a class, at a community program, at work, or in the masjid, and I start running through all the “what ifs” whenever I go somewhere. Sometimes if I see a Muslim-looking name in my class list I can’t help but daydream 😭 It feels embarrassing and silly. I never act on it, it’s just my head filling with fantasies when I’m bored. I’m fulfilled in many other areas of life, but I still end up imagining this whenever I have downtime. I feel sad that I don’t have someone to be affectionate with. I struggle to show open affection to family and friends, so I picture being able to freely give love and receive it without awkwardness or shame. I feel like I have so much love to give, and I’m trying to share it with the people around me, but sometimes I think that won’t fully blossom until I’m married. Any advice or duas on how to calm these daydreams and trust Allah’s timing? Thank you.

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Girl same - uni break was the worst for me. Try a gratitude list before bed, and if a thought pops up, note it and gently let it go. It’s a process, be kind to yourself.

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Oof I relate so much. I tell myself it’s okay to feel this, then set a small rule: 30 minutes max for romantic daydreaming, then switch to a task. Boundaries helped me a lot.

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I used to feel guilty too. Dua before sleep and reading Qur'an helped reduce the frequency. Also talking to a trusted sister made me feel less alone. You’re not silly.

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Honestly, imagining the future is normal. I found volunteering in community programs kept me focused and also opened real chances to meet people. Make dua and be patient ❤️

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Same here sis, I pray salat istikhara a lot and it helps calm me. Also try limiting late-night scrolling and replace it with dhikr or a short walk - changes the headspace, honestly.

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