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3 months ago

Exhausted by so many cultural Muslims - need to vent

As-salamu alaykum. Please let me vent for a minute. 9 out of 10 Muslims I know or see every day seem to be cultural Muslims. To me these people are worse than non-believers because they give outsiders a wrong impression of Islam and of us. Where I'm from, cultural Muslims are basically secularists who just wear the "Muslim" label. Most only pray on Fridays. Those who do pray regularly often do it mechanically - they don't even seem to understand what they're reciting (I get choked up thinking about people reciting without feeling, like when someone mumbles Surah Masad). It feels like many don't understand taqwa, tawakkul, or even the basics of Islam. Some wear a hijab only around family, then take it off as soon as they go to university or travel a short distance from home - I've seen this happen so often. They'll lecture you about the importance of praying five times a day while they skip prayers themselves. Everything feels so surface-level. Some justify drinking beer by telling themselves it's less sinful than rum or whiskey. As someone who takes this deen seriously, I feel isolated among a sea of cultural Muslims. Even my own family members are like this. People have told me to make friends at the masjid, but the mosque circles here are more political than spiritual, and the masjid feels like a place where people just pray and leave. Honestly, it's really frustrating. Has anyone else experienced this? How do you cope with feeling alone in your commitment to Islam?

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5comments
3 months ago

I feel you sis. Grew up around the same vibe - so performative. I try to find one or two sincere friends and stick with them, even if it’s just chatting after Friday prayer. Makes a big difference.

+6
3 months ago

Ugh yes. I stopped arguing with relatives about small hypocrisies and instead invite the few who seem curious to study circles or Quran classes. Small steps helped me feel less alone.

+10
3 months ago

Same here. I try to be gentle - people are at different stages - but it’s exhausting. Therapy + dua + consistent routine keeps me sane. Also online halaqas are lifesavers.

+7
3 months ago

Totally relatable. I moved cities to find a more spiritually active community and it helped a lot. Even just one friend who actually practices is a game changer.

+4
3 months ago

This hits hard. I cry when I hear people recite without feeling too. I try to focus on my own ibadah and remind myself that guidance is from Allah, not my job to fix everyone.

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