Does our community sometimes numb us to grief? As-salamu alaykum - feeling let down

As-salamu alaykum. I’m honestly tired of the community here. Not everyone is rude, but where I live it’s become unbearable. I recently lost my father. I’m young, a university student, and this is what’s been happening. Aunties treated my dad’s death like gossip - saying we should move out, that we’ll struggle, calling it a shame. My so-called friends didn’t show up: no condolences, didn’t attend the janazah, didn’t come for the Quran khani held for him. I don’t even want to wear my hijab right now, but I feel forced to because everyone is watching and talking about my family after this loss. If I took it off they’d whisper, “She removed her hijab and must be doing forbidden things,” because that’s how gossip goes here. The reasons I’m struggling with the hijab are personal - losing my dad and grandfather, repeated incidents where I’ve faced abuse - and I can’t explain all that now. My main point is how disappointed I am in my own people for not helping my family. No one supported my mother when we needed practical help; I needed aunties and uncles to step in, but all I heard was “pray for him” or “make dua.” I already know to make dua, but I lost someone - he’s gone - and I’m allowed to want to talk about him without being shut down with “that’s how it was written, you’ll move on eventually.” More non‑Muslims have offered sincere condolences than many Muslims here, and that says a lot. I’m not proud to say it, but it makes me withdraw from wanting to be associated with some Muslims. I’m sorry, but the way many acted was truly painful and unreasonable.