Curious About Our Nikah Journey as a Non-Muslim Woman
As-salamu alaykum everyone! My husband-to-be and I have been together for almost two years now, and we’re hoping to find a place and live together sometime within the next year inshaAllah. Just to share a bit about us: he is Egyptian Muslim, and he and his family are quite modern Muslims living in the US for over a decade. My family is Christian but not very religious. Recently, he mentioned that before we move in together, it’s important for us to have a Nikah ceremony with a Sheikh, which I’m totally okay with, but since this isn’t something common in my family, I wanted to learn more from others who might be familiar with it. Right now, he’s starting a new job and is a bit stressed, so I haven’t pushed the conversation much because it’s a big step and I don’t want to overwhelm him. I’m someone who likes to plan ahead, so I’ve been thinking about it quietly. He mentioned that some couples nowadays do Nikah as a way to live together and be close before having a larger wedding ceremony later. We both have a lot going on - I’m still in college working toward a master’s degree, and he’s focused on his new job - so we’re not ready for a big legal wedding with extended family yet, but we’re ready to have our own space together. I’d love to hear from anyone who has experience with Nikah and could share some insights or answer a few questions for me! Since I’m not very religious myself, I see this as a meaningful way for us to recognize our love and commitment, and he agrees, but from a more spiritual angle. Is it okay if we exchange rings, like promise rings? When we have the full wedding ceremony in the future, will the Sheikh be part of that again? How should I prepare for the Nikah? What kind of dress is appropriate or commonly worn by the bride? Will I need to read or recite anything? Maybe these questions sound a bit silly, but I’m really excited because this is the love of my life! Also, I’d appreciate any stories or advice about Nikah or Islamic celebrations in general, and any info about his faith and culture would be wonderful since I want to understand it better just as he’s learning about mine. Just to clarify, I’m sharing this to celebrate our relationship and learn, not to be judged or called haram. I’m aware of our differences, and I’ve been welcomed into his family with open arms despite our different beliefs and cultures. Let’s respect each other’s journeys. Surah Al-Hujurāt 49:11