Coping with Family Struggles During Eid

Eid was yesterday here in Pakistan. I'm writing this late at night, feeling heavy-hearted. My father has been abusive and narcissistic our whole lives, treating my mother and us siblings badly. When we were kids, he'd beat us over school grades. One time, in third grade, I got 84% and my brother got 82%. Since his rule was 90% minimum, he tied my legs and my brother's hands with rope and beat us with a wooden bat, leaving marks. That's just one example. His behavior never stopped. We endured it mostly to protect our mom-when we tried to stand up, he'd blame her for raising us wrong, insult her late father, and even push or try to slap her. About seven years back, I finally spoke up during a fight about food, and he beat me, abused my mother again, and cut off talking to me for two months. Honestly, those months were peaceful. Now, I'm finishing university, my brother is in his last year of medical school, and my sisters work. Yesterday on Eid, while eating, an argument started because my father wanted to host friends but my mom needed to visit her sister, which he knew about. He got angry, cursing her, and my brother couldn't hold back-he shouted, telling him to stop this years-long abuse. My father yelled back, listing money spent on our education and bills, blamed my mom for my brother's 'gangster' behavior, and it almost turned physical. We all intervened. My brother and I are religious and know our duties to respect our father. We've tried hard, giving gifts, showing affection, but trauma sometimes makes us react beyond Islamic boundaries. We've rarely raised our voice, always aiming for peace. Ironically, he talks about good manners being judged by Allah, yet his manners are the worst. I've made sincere dua for him in prayers, asking Allah to soften his heart and bring love between my parents. Once, when he had a heart attack, only my mom and I were there; we took care of him, even helping him with bathroom needs. But a week later, he was back insulting her in front of relatives. We suggested my mom consider separation, but she stays for our future, though we feel living with him hinders that. My questions: Can I make bad-dua against him? Should I withhold forgiveness so he's accountable? I've forgiven my own trauma but not his pain to my mother. He's spent much on our education and bills, which conflicts my heart-if I make bad-dua, would that be sinful or wrong?