Can I Protect My Dignity While Keeping My Faith?
As-salamualaikum. I grew up in a household that was more Christian in practice even though I was born Muslim - my parents divorced and I drifted away for a long time. Only recently have I started to follow Islam more properly. Because I wasn't practicing before, I'm dealing with strong sexual urges. For years I used to deal with them in private, and a few months ago I decided to stop that habit because I learned it's disliked in Islam. I used to spend whole days lost in it and I don't want to go back. My current issue is practical and kind of embarrassing. I moved in with my father's family and there's not enough space, so I sleep in the living room on a fold-up mattress next to my brother. I don't struggle so much with intentional lust, but I have semi-regular wet dreams. Usually I can sneak to the shower and hide my clothes, but last night it happened at 3 a.m. I managed to shower, but when I was done other family members were awake and I couldn't put my clothes in the hamper without them seeing. The shame was overwhelming. I know this might be a test from Allah (swt), and I don’t expect He would force me into only humiliating options. I'm wondering if Allah (swt) would be merciful and allow me to take some practical steps to manage my urges and protect my dignity - for example, arranging sleeping space differently, timing showers, or other lawful measures - while I keep trying to strengthen my faith and avoid sinful actions. I want to stay sincere in my iman but also preserve my honor and avoid shame in front of my family. Any gentle advice or reassurance would be appreciated.