Brother, I feel so alone
Assalamu alaykum - I've felt disconnected from people for as long as I can remember. Moving to the West hasn't fixed it. On the surface I get along with folks and have casual friendships, but I can't be my full self around them because our values clash - with liberal Western views and even with some conservatives. There are clear no-go topics in my friendships, like LGBT issues, where I can't share my beliefs. I also feel like I'm stuck between worlds: too Western for many Arabs and too Arab for Westerners. What have others done in this situation? It often feels like I don't have real friends here. I should add that I haven't yet met a sister I really connect with, and I'm trying to change that. I also worry my non-Muslim friends would reject me if I told them what I truly believe. Living in the West long enough has made me able to see things from both sides. I've noticed that left-leaning people can seem like better friends because they champion minorities, and they tend to include LGBTQ issues in that. But sometimes their acceptance feels conditional, like they support Muslims only if we stop being visibly Muslim. I love my English friends and value them, which makes this even harder. I'm more pessimistic now, and I guess I'm asking: how do you find genuine Muslim company or balance being true to your faith while living here?