Assalamu alaikum - I'm struggling with questions about women's rulings in Islam

Assalamu alaikum. I know this is long, please bear with me. I'm not trying to cause fitna; I genuinely have been wrestling with these thoughts and can't help but question some things about how women are treated in certain rulings. I used to be very practicing - wearing niqab, avoiding music and films, giving advice to others - but lately I've begun doubting some specific teachings about women that I used to accept or rationalize. I kept telling myself I must be misunderstanding, but the questions keep coming back. Examples that trouble me: - Beating the wife (even if some say it is symbolic and light): why would a grown woman need to be disciplined like a child? It feels demeaning. - Inheritance: why can't I receive the same share and provide for myself? - The narration about commanding a wife to prostrate for her husband: why is there praise for that? The husband provides money, but the wife has responsibilities too - obedience, service, childbirth, asking permission to go out, restrictions on fasting or hosting guests without his consent. She has to cover herself and carry burdens, yet is told to obey. Why is that glorified? - Obeying the husband even before parents; why must an adult woman be submissive to another adult? - Qiwamah and needing a man’s permission in the family: I’m an adult - why do I need a man telling me what’s right and wrong? - Divorce and khul‘: having to return the mahr to leave feels like a slave buying her freedom. The justification that women are emotional and divorce at will doesn’t sit right; men also divorce impulsively. I read classical statements treating marriage like a purchase, which makes me uneasy. - Sayings that most of hellfire are women because they curse or are ungrateful - often without considering those women might be abused by husbands who are allowed to discipline them. There are many more examples, but overall the pattern I see is rulings that preserve male authority, ego, and hierarchy. Why is leadership assumed to be for men? Why is authority so controlling instead of shared partnership? Even financial responsibility becomes power - the one with money can feed or starve, control decisions. People say these rulings reflected a misogynistic society 1,400 years ago and were made lighter, but other deeply rooted harms (gambling, drinking, killing baby girls, tribal vengeance) were abolished. Why could those be fixed but not these? Why only partial reform? Because of this I stopped following scholars on these topics. I still hold to Islam - I love Allah and believe in the fundamentals like prayer, fasting, and charity - but when it comes to rulings about women I get stuck. I’ve studied classical and modern interpretations and tried to take them seriously, but it still looks like misogyny shaped much of the rulings. I’m not asking for judgment. I’m sharing my struggle and hoping others can relate or point me toward compassionate, sincere explanations that address these concerns without dismissing them. Jazakum Allahu khair.