Assalamu Alaikum - I feel distant from Allah and want to return, but I don’t know how
Assalamu Alaikum, I’m writing this with a heavy heart because I feel like I’ve drifted far from Allah and the deen. I grew up Muslim and always believed, but over time, because of bad influences and my own weak choices, I slipped. I used to drink for a while - Alhamdulillah I quit and sincerely repented. But now I’m struggling with an addiction to weed and I use it regularly. I know it’s not right, and it makes me feel even farther from my faith. On top of that I’ve stopped praying consistently. Every few days I’m hit with guilt and regret. I miss Salah, that peace and closeness to Allah. I want to change. I honestly do. But I keep asking myself - what about all the prayers I’ve missed? Will Allah hold me accountable for them even if I sincerely try to return? Can I still be forgiven after not praying for years? I fear Allah and I don’t want to live like this anymore. I want to find my way back, but I don’t know where to begin. If anyone has been through something similar or has practical advice on rebuilding a connection with Allah - how to start praying again, deal with addiction, and handle the guilt over missed worship - please share. I really need guidance and encouragement. JazakAllah khair for reading.