Asking for Guidance About Fear of Allah and the Hereafter

Assalamu alaykum. Sorry if my grammar is messy - I’m 13 and I’ve been struggling with my mental health for a while. Lately I have this deep, constant fear of Allah and the Day of Judgment. I feel so guilty about having this fear and I don’t know if it’s something I should be worried about. I’m really terrified of the punishment of hell, and even during Islamic classes my mind keeps going to thoughts of what punishments might be like. Sometimes it feels like I just want this world (dunya) to end quickly. I worry that I’ll only get worse the longer it goes on, and that scares me. I don’t want to commit suicide, but I want this life to end soon so inshaAllah I can be in Jannah instead of facing punishment. I know I’ve done many sins, some small and some big. Some were accidental, others were on purpose. I feel like shaytan has led me far from the right path and I don’t know how to come back to normal. I also struggle a lot with my identity - deep in my heart I feel like I’m a boy, and I even hesitated to write my birth gender at the start. I can’t enjoy pretending to be a boy in this dunya, and I worry about what that means for the hereafter. I understand that in Jannah we will all be perfectly happy and content, but I’m confused: will I feel at peace with my creation there, and will my feelings be resolved by Allah’s mercy? I’m really looking for gentle, sincere advice from fellow Muslims. How can I manage this constant fear of punishment while also finding a way back to Allah? How do I seek sincere repentance and feel hopeful about Allah’s mercy? And how do I deal with these deep feelings about my gender in a way that’s in line with my faith and helps me find peace? Thank you for any kind guidance or duas.