As-salamu alaykum - The Quran Heals the Heart

As-salamu alaykum, I want to start with the verse from Surah Ar-Ra'd because it exactly describes what I'm going through: “Those who believe and whose hearts find comfort in the remembrance of Allah. Indeed, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find comfort.” I often see sisters sharing their struggles, so I hoped this might encourage someone. Ramadan is near too, and many of us are making plans for the month. I've been learning for years with my mu'allima. It's been hard and I'm still trying to balance things and stay organised. Lately I've been doing more tadabbur, reading translations and reflecting on the meaning. SubhanAllah, that has helped me so much - words don't fully capture it but I'll try. Last year I faced many trials, including one of the toughest things I've ever been through. On top of that, I live in France, and you know how difficult it can be for practising Muslims there. I've worn the hijab for nine years and I've been through a lot; people can be very hateful and it's been a nightmare at times. But now, I don't let it affect me the way I used to. I'm proud to wear the hijab. I'm proud to represent Islam. I'm proud to be a servant of Allah. I feel deep peace, tawakkul and contentment. I'm still working and living my life, I have goals, but this dunya matters less to me now. I want Allah's pleasure above all. I want to see His Face, to feel His nearness. I long for His companionship like never before. That doesn't mean I'm perfect - far from it - there are many things I still need to work on, but I can feel the closeness to Allah. I cry when I hear du'a, the Quran or Islamic reminders. I've become very sensitive to anything related to the deen. I now miss the Quran when I don't read it for a day; I crave it. SubhanAllah, this change is a huge blessing and I'm so grateful to Him. I really encourage you to build a relationship with the Quran. If you don't yet read Arabic, find a teacher and start learning. Learn tajweed and take it step by step. In the beginning I couldn't read at all, and now Alhamdulillah I read fluently. It's never too late - I'm 30 and currently on Surah Al-Muzzamil, and that's okay. May Allah guide us and accept our efforts. Ameen.